Chris Mezzolesta | Professional Voice Actor for Character & Commercial

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Now at PlanetFord.com Choose from over 10,000 Ford vehicles at the lowest available prices in America. PlanetFord.com Rapid credit approval. Easy purchase process. Express delivery anywhere in the nation. Dependable service. PlanetFord.com Number 1 in Texas. Top 10 in the USA. With over 500,000 new Fords sold. We make it easier than ever to buy your next new Ford car, truck, or SUV.

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It's clearance time, baby! G-G-G-Grand Bay Honda! Hey, do you want to drive a brand new Honda?

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Did you miss the clunker deadline? No! Did you have registration or insurance problems? Do you want $4,500 for your old trade? Well, take that old clunker and you'll save! At Craig May Chevrolet in West!

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It's a good, good day at the Heritage Family of Dealerships, HeritageAtlanta.com. With the Heritage Advantage, Cadillac and Infinity Ownership has even more privileges.

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Attention car, truck, and SUV owners! Do you need a new vehicle right now? Don't miss the big trade-in event going on now at Gregg May Honda!

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Hundreds of quality used vehicles discounted up to half off original retail value for Chevy, Toyota, Honda, and more! All the best sellers, now up to half off!

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Get 110% fair Kelley Blue Book value or $2,500 for your old trade.

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Being purple has its privileges. Point, click, drive. It's easy. Only at KansasStateCars.com.

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The following podcast may contain explicit language and offensive material, like this.

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Indubitably. And I then realized that the political positions I had hitherto taken for granted were, upon momentary reflection, specious nonsense. So, naturally, I was eager to join any effort to impede the festering orange carbuncle who currently befouls the gluteus maximus of the body politic.

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I'll handle this. Son, son, I don't want to bust your chops on your birthday, but this is a real rookie mistake.

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Out of my way you hippie surfer, I'm about to invade Mexico, you trying to tell me that there ain't any more margaritas on this island, look at me, I'm hanging 20, 21 if you count my willy.

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And finally, Lord, I do thank you for gradually lifting the burden of those impure and painful thoughts from me. I really think I've turned the corner. Though I do miss my African friends. Well, at least they are less frequent.

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Yes. What? Oh, hi. Hi, Father Ravioli. Have a... Wait, wait, wait. What do you mean, where is he? Isn't he in his kindergarten class? Now, Father Ravioli, calm down. I'm sure that's not right. I didn't... Look, I didn't... I didn't... I made him wear pants.

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Announcing Elizabeth II, by the grace of God, of the United Kingdom of Great Britain and Northern Ireland, and of her other realms and territories, Queen, Head of the Commonwealth, Defender of the Faith.

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Flingstreet, of course, hasn't had a single hit this year. He's a lowly, good-natured farm boy with a humble background and a shy demeanor, who's lived his whole life in the shadow of his father, Hall of Famer Sharp Flingstreet, and is just out to prove that he's his own man and a ball player in his own right.

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Comedic vignette. A scene in an apothecary. Record number 2742. Made for the Fidem Interactive Phonograph Company of New York, Paris, London, Los Angeles, and Stockholm, New Jersey.

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The Mockingbird's egg is at home, wherever it lands. Ah, Vera, Zizkite, you know the game. That, uh, president of yours, ripping up the Orandeal, that was a triumph. Now, not so much. I tried to warn him he was playing with fire, but did he listen? Then that Schmendrick's son-in-law gets in over his head, and... Hey!

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I can hear your name on the wind again, Pa. A constant reminder of my failures. How can I go on? I just don't have any more hope left at all.

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That is insupportable! How will I function? They'll see through my facade in a heartbeat! I NEEDS TO DO ME SOME SHOOTIN'! YEAH! Gracious!

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Jawohl! I mean, yes sir. As you are well aware, today the swarthy hordes can stroll through the Sonoran Desert like it was Central Park. I'd like to see them try it once we make the desert... radioactive! They'll be dropping like flies!

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You are both idiotskies! Ahem. I mean, comrades. Odrost rozhdoyetska, glupost izuzhoyetsya. Wisdom is born, stupidity is learned. I have plan.

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Well, howdy, Mr. President. This here's Cowboy Bill, comin' at ya from Laredo. You see these little fellers right here? Oh, well these are Mexican desert ferrets, and their fur is the secret ingredient in your special presidential hair weave. And right here, on the Mexican border, is the only spot on Earth where you can find them. Well, it's time for my boot heels to be wanderin'. Bye now.

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Hey kids! Grab your snuggles and head over to Pat Catan's this summer for their Under the Sea Kids Camps!

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My musical treatment of 3rd rack and phrasia will cause perspiration to form beneath my dog collar. You shall watch 3rd rack or be chastised more severely.

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I can hear you, channel 2! Stripes is on tonight at 8 on channel 2, watch it!

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Part of Fox 49's weeknight comedy lineup, starting at 5 with Roseanne, The Simpsons, Home Improvement, and Frasier at 6.30.

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Once again, teams of student crafters will compete in a battle of cunning, courage, and creativity. Only one team will emerge as the Iron Crafter.

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As the clock strikes one, prepare yourself for the Saturday Night Frights! Mwahahahaha!

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I know, RTA is the hassle-free way to travel. I'm just not sure I'm ready.

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On Saturday, October 28th, Pat Catanz invites you to join us for our early bird trick-or-treat. Boys and girls of every age can wear their costumes. Make a free Halloween treat bag.

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You ain't with it if you ain't watchin' 3rd Rock. You better hit it, cause Frasier is a fat doc. Dicks an alien, slammin' like Mr. Spock.

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Have no fear, my man. I'm all over it.

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Tata ba, Landeli bako Pese u sija le lizue i zirongo

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He had his fun and, next slide please, he died of a ghastly venereal disease. Too late, he learned he'd acted like a fool. You gotta get those sinful feelings locked away, until you reach that very blessed wedding day. But in the meantime, keep it in your pants. Play it smart, give abstinence a chance.

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What he did one rainy day, impressed me even more. Well, he returned his shopping cart in the supermarket parking lot. When you list the guy's achievements, please don't forget that spot.

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He landed in the middle of a village, a busy old gang was about to kill it. It came down with a game show host and a type machine. We heard it most. This prize wheel will change your lives. Put down all your swords and knives. When you're challenged on the battlefield, all you do is spin the wheel.

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Well, it's Christmastime in the U.S.A., but it seems like only yesterday that the atheists and Muslims were grinning. Cause the war on Christmas Day was a-winnin'. I shudder each time I remember those dark and dreary Decembers. Like lambs led to the slaughter, we were feelin' like Christian martyrs.

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Those scavengers, those scavengers, they'll pay for all their crimes. And they're coming for Ed. And they're coming for Ed. Why they have to remake Spider-Man 60,000 times. And now they come for Ed. And now they come for Ed.

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Janus Gorch, and if your answer's no, please let him down easy. As if you were landing on a posturpedic mattress. With your $400 this week at Lenny's Bedding, take exit 5 getting off the turnpike, turn right at the light, and look out for the construction.

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I'm going to give you a little anatomy lesson.

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I'll hoist up me skull and crossbones and kill her, yeah ye mangy horse son! Yo-ho! Yo-ho-ho-ho-ho-ho-ho! Blow me down! I'll scallywag to town! Are ye bilge drinker? You're a bilge-ranformin' sir! Walk your flag! You trippin' angel! Ye scurvy girfowl-swashbuckler! Whoa! Blow me down!

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You're already like a Puerto Riqueno You're powerless and always in the dark But don't you worry Donnie, we will train you You'll be getting along just like the Jets and the Sharks

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Hey, it worked for Phil Collins, and it worked for Elton John. You'll connect with the adults, and you'll connect with all the kids. What an easy way to keep from hittin' the skids. It's my considered opinion, as a matter of fact, that they'll be waitin' round the corner for you with a big contract. Write a Disney song, get Danny Elfman to fume it. Just write the same kind of stuff as Randy Newman.

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The truth is being smart can be a burden Having to sift between the different shades of grey All this heightened mental acuity only leads to ambiguity It's oh so very taxing to think all day But being dumb is not to fall The hell with thinking, either done It makes it super easy to be sure All that cogitating time ain't even worth a dime When your mind is full of nothing but manure

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We didn't care who we were smearing in those television hearings, long as it made the news above the fold. The suckers took it on the chin, that's when the checks came pouring in. We were swimming in a river of gold. Hit them hard! Use our machete!

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I have just been honored by my favorite magazine. Incel Monthly voted me... 🎵 Most Eligible Involuntary Celebrant of 2018! 🎵

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Our menu has recently changed. It was just yesterday, or maybe last week, that it came to our attention, that it's been 20 years, since we recorded the message, that our menu has recently changed.

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And it's modern times, but feels like the old days The kind that I recall in distant dreams Everything changed when the fabric of time unraveled Like a two-bit plot! They tell me that it's Tuesday, but it sure feels like a Monday And it's not cause I took Monday off

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There are no dictionaries needed, when your head's inside a noose. Noose is a four-letter word, like John Elway or LeBron. But posters on the internet always seem to get it wrong. They think it has an extra O, but I know that it's just not so. When you root for Cleveland sports teams, well it's something that you know.

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Or leave you on the small world ride at Disneyland But instead we choose to sit you at the table near the band Yes, you're sitting at the table near the band You'll be forever at the table near the band The table near the band The table near the band The table near the band The table near the band

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And as I drove away, I thought I heard her say Welcome to the Build-A-Deal People change but never will Never seen a happy meal Welcome to the Build-A-Deal People change but never will Never seen a happy meal Welcome to the Build-A-Deal People change but never will Never seen a happy meal Welcome to the Build-A-Deal

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Don't forget to click the drop-down menu above and stay around for more voicetal demos.

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You've never seen anything like this before. Beneful from Purina has wholesome grains for energy, protein-rich beef that helps build strong muscles, and vegetables with vitamins and minerals.

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It's more car than electric. Is this that electric car? The all-new Chevy Volt. Yeah. Electric when you want it. With a gas tank. Gas when you need it.

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Hey, buddy, if you're gonna sit naked on the couch, put a towel down.

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How do we make sure everyone in the family has a wonderful vacation aboard the new Disney Dream? Well, if we were to tell you, it wouldn't be magic, now would it?

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Hormel Chili Master Chili, now in four premium flavors. Go ahead, break out the good ladle.

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To demonstrate how itchy it can be to install insulation in a 100 degree attic in the middle of summer, we've placed our volunteer into a small closet filled with 7,000 mosquitoes.

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At Optimum, we're dedicated to providing you with something you never have to think about. The best TV, phone, and internet service 24-7.

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It's one thing when your kid ignores you. It's another to be ignored by someone you trust with your investments. As a Schwab client, you can work with a financial consultant who listens first, talks second.

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Vizine Advanced Relief. Gets the red out and more.

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The question isn't, can this weight loss program change your life? The question is, can you?

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That? Oh, that's the kids playing in our yard, so it's a few dents in the side of the house.

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After the surgery, the doctors were all kidding around with me, telling me I did all the hard work. You know, they may consider it just all in a day's work, but to me, they gave me my life back.

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You've got a problem to which there's no obvious solution. What do you do? Chances are, you might organize a standard brainstorming session. And that's fine.

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The NLRB will seek to resolve these issues prior to the election.

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You test the credit card validation SOA composite deployed to the Oracle SOA Suite 11g instance by using the Oracle Enterprise Manager 11g Fusion Middleware Control Console.

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As the Border Patrol aircraft approaches the target area, pilots must confirm weapon settings, PRF codes, and arm weapons using the ACP.

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Beer has an opportunity to gain share, particularly in the meal occasion, the biggest in this market type.

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There are three key qualities of effective documentation. Good documentation is objective, detailed yet succinct, and clearly matches the essential indicator identified.

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Do not offer advice to any potential municipal issuer or municipal obligor about whether or not to seek municipal bond versus private loan financing or how to structure a municipal bond issue.

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That is the end of this module. The aim was to bring some of the theory to life, allowing you to see a circuit in action and confirm your understanding of how valves and actuators work.

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Now is this starting to make sense? Your email, text, voice broadcast, direct mail, Facebook, Twitter, webinars, pop-ups. The only limit is your imagination. Isn't that awesome?

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Writing comes easy to some but not others. You get a burst of creative energy and start writing like crazy and then the writer's block. You sit and wait for inspiration to knock it out of the way but there it is. So how do you get around writer's block?

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This is Jeff. Jeff is a voice actor, and he's got a really good voiceover demo. Unfortunately, people aren't listening through to the end of his demo. They could be missing some of Jeff's best work. And Jeff could be missing out on some possible clients.

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In the very near future, lab-grown meat is going to be cheaper, faster, and more environmentally friendly to produce. But how exactly does one grow meat in a lab? The process isn't as weird as you might think.

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Ultimately, when it's time for Betty to go to the great chicken afterlife, it should be easier for consumers to pick Ralph for dinner. But a carbon tax isn't the only way to make carbon more expensive. Enter Cap-and-Trade.

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Scoop Scoop, Yum Yum, Ruggles Ice Cream's premium, Scoop Scoop, Yum Yum, Ruggles gotta get me some!

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All the Wildcats say, KSU! KSU! KSU! Oh yeah!

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Le chant de l'amour Je t'aime, sous-chérie, F.M.

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BuzzFeed Blogging Now!

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Call 877-PAYLESS! Stanford Chevrolet!

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American Ninja! Use your hands and feet! To kick some booty! And generate some heat!

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laugh yeah every weeknight third rock does it right and fraser does too

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Come to Koenig's for all the sports in you!

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Founded as a family-owned ironmongery shop in Bielefeld, Germany by Karl Benteler in 1876, Benteler has enjoyed 135 years of successful innovative growth.

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You get detailed, immediate feedback on who played your demo, exactly when, where, which track was played, and for how long. Only Voice SAM provides talent with this incredible analysis tool.

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No two corners are the same, and neither is Goodyear's approach to the new Eagle F1 asymmetric tread design.

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Whether you're an exhibitor, a delegate, or a speaker, IRF's regional congresses provide you with an unparalleled opportunity to showcase innovation, share best practices, promote your company and organization.

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Today, IOMAX USA is a full-spectrum provider for signals intelligence and airborne system solutions, serving customers across the globe.

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Light to full body with a long, lush finish. Benedetto is love at first sight.

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The AutoBag CD Packaging System features a unique multi-spindle carousel that automatically bags 55 discs per minute.

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Patients with preeclampsia present with proteinuria, visual disturbances, headaches, and edema. From the point of diagnosis, careful monitoring and management are required to preserve the health of the mother and fetus. As a condition that may be caused by the trophoblastic invasion of the spiral arterioles at the site of the placenta, preeclampsia can hinder fetal development. The mother is at risk of grand mal seizures, general organ malfunction due to impaired circulation, and severe neurological manifestations.

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Percutaneous coronary intervention, also known as coronary angioplasty, opens narrowed coronary arteries. A catheter inserted in an artery in the groin or arm is threaded to the affected artery. A second catheter is then inserted inside the first one. When the catheter reaches the narrowed area, a balloon on its tip is inflated to reopen the artery. While the catheters are in the artery, a stent may be placed to prevent re-narrowing after an artery is widened.

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Linaclotide, a guanylate cyclase C agonist, is licensed in the UK for the symptomatic treatment of moderate to severe irritable bowel syndrome, IBS, with constipation in adults. Luboprostone is a chloride channel activator that increases chloride concentration in the intestinal fluid, increasing fluid secretion and resulting in increased gastrointestinal motility. Prucalipride is a selective serotonin 5 HT4 receptor agonist that stimulates colonic motility.

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Mendelian heredity of LS started with the recognition of mutations in one subunit of complex II, but mutations in many subunits of the giant complex I followed the example of direct hits, that is, mutations affecting directly subunits of respiratory chain complexes. More common are LSs due to indirect hits, that is, to mutations affecting assembly proteins needed to put together mtDNA-encoded and nDNA-encoded subunits, most notably involving assembly proteins for complex IV, cytochrome c oxidase, complex V, ATP synthase, or biosynthetic enzymes for coenzyme Q10, CoQ10.

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Thank you for calling Lauberge Casino Resort in Lake Charles, the pinnacle of luxury entertainment in southwest Louisiana. Are you looking to reserve, change, or cancel a stay at our AAA four-diamond hotel? If so, press 1.

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MediSure offers a wide selection of products that improve mobility and make home life more accessible. Everything from bathroom safety to wheelchair accessible vehicles to keep you on the go. Feel free to ask us for more details when we return to the line.

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Thank you for calling Northside Trucking. We offer same day pickup and delivery within our service area. Northside Trucking offers logistic and shipping service throughout the U.S. and all of Canada. We offer cross dock service, drop switch yard, truck and trailer parking, and provide LTL pickup and delivery service. We look forward to meeting all your transportation requirements today.

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Whatever your driving needs, style, or budget may be, we're sure to have a vehicle with your name on it. We appreciate your patience while on hold and look forward to speaking with you soon.

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Thank you for calling Exteriors by Artisans. Please listen closely as our menu options have changed. If you know the extension of the person you would like to reach, you may dial it at any time. For sales, press 1. For accounting, press 2. To reach a live customer service representative, press 0.

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Please rate your experience with our representative on a scale of 1 to 5, where 1 is Poor and 5 is Outstanding.

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All of our agents are currently busy at this time. Your call is very important to us. Please stay on the line and your call will be answered in the order it was received.

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You have reached the After Hours Message Center for the Sales Department. Our office hours are 8 to 5 Monday through Friday. We appreciate your call. Please leave a complete message including your name, number, and the best time to contact you. Your call will be returned on the next business day. Thank you for calling.

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In a few words, please tell me what it is you're calling about. For example, you could say, I have a question about my account, or, I'm having trouble with my service. To speak to a representative, say, Representative, or press 0. To hear this menu again, say, Menu, or press 1.